Nikaido Takahashi (Kis-My-Ft2) - Jossie Matsumura no SCREAM

Look at me translating things that aren't from the 80s!

Jossie Matsumura no SCREAM is the last song on disc 2 of Kis-My-Ft2's 2016 album, I SCREAM. It was literally out like 2 weeks ago so my translation probably sucks but there you go. It's a solo song by Nikaido Takashi describing the love of a fangirl for his fellow group member, Tamamori Yuta. It's composed by ERIK SMAALAND who apparently enjoys having his name in all caps as if he's yelling, and written by Jossie Matsumura. Ie Nikaido.

This is a really interesting song with an interesting theme so I'd recommend it if you want to hear something a bit different but if you're not particularly a Kisumai fan you might not really enjoy it as you'll have no clue what's going on. The PV is funny, however, and stars Nikaido as Jossie Matsumura herself along with Tamamori as Moritama Yudai (a guy at Jossie's school who looks exactly like Tamamori) and Senga as Tamamori's girlfriend. 

I would post the PV to my blog but Johnny's would probably hunt me down with pitchforks. Please look it up if you're interested though. It is the greatest PV of all time. 

ジョッシー松村のSCREAM

作詞：ジョッシー松村
作曲：ERIK SMAALAND

キス ×10
LOVE　キスマイ Yes！！
キス ×9
LOVE　キスマイ Yes！！

ど〜も〜！　皆様初めまして！　私は冴えない女子1人！！
キューティーになりたい私の名前はジョッシー松村！！
まっちゃんです！！
(マッチャンハナヤメルジョシー ×2)
そんな私は悩める女子です！！
最近気になる人がいます！！ (ワォ！)
キッスーもしたいよ！！　ポスターに！！
気になるアイドル！　キスマイです！！

特に気になる前3人　ハッピーをくれるの！！
この3人！！　3人の中でも私の一押し！！
オットリ　ホンワカ　玉ちゃんです！！
(マッチャンハタマチャンホシイ　×2)
玉ちゃん！　を応援したくて降臨！　ジャニーズ公認！
チアリーダー！！　いーかー？！　皆もついてきてーね！！
Ready Set Go！！

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
キスマイLOVE！！
Ready Set Go！！
Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
キスマイLOVEです！！
中毒です！！

LOVE　キスマイ Yes！！ ×4

「どうせ私は冴えない女子よ、、
私なんて最初から玉ちゃんを好きになってはいけなかったんだわ、、、」

「まっちゃんならできる！！」

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
キスマイLOVE！！
「まっちゃんならできる！！」

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
キスマイLOVE！！
Ready Set Go！！
Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！
キスマイLOVEです！！
重症です！！

キス ×9
LOVE　キスマイ Yes！！
キス ×9
LOVE　キスマイ Yes！！

Jossie Matsumura’s SCREAM (1)

Hi--i! Nice to meet you! I’m a plain girl!! (2)

I wanna to be a cutie and my name is Jossie Matsumura!!

Nickname Macchan!!

(Macchan is a worried girl….Macchan is a worried girl…)

There’s something I’m worried about!!

Right now, there’s someone I’m interested in! ! (Fo!)

I even want to kiss!! My poster!!

The idol I’m interested in! It’s Kisumai!!

I especially like the main 3

These three make me happy!!

Out of these 3 my favourite is

The calm and carefree Tama-chan!!

(Macchan wants Tama-chan...Macchan wants Tama-chan…)

I support Tama-chan so much!

I’ve risen to where

Everyone sees me as

Johnny’s biggest fan!! (3)

I’m his cheerleader! Okay?! Everyone join in! !

Ready Set Go ! !

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Kisumai LOVE！！

Ready Set Go！！

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

It’s Kisumai LOVE！！

I’m addicted!

LOVE Kisumai Yes！！ ×4

“I’m just a boring girl after all...Someone like me should never have fallen in love with Tama-chan in the first place…” (2)

“You can do it Macchan!”

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Kisumai LOVE! !

“You can do it, Macchan!”

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Kisumai LOVE！！

Ready Set Go！！

Yes！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Wicked！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

Come-on！！ Everybody, Let's go！！

It’s Kisumai LOVE！！

I’m love sick! (4)

Kiss x 9

LOVE Kisumai Yes ! !

Kiss x 9

LOVE Kisumai Yes ! !

Translation Notes that I can never get to format properly

(1) The official romaji on the English Johnny’s website is Josshii but I went with Jossie instead. Why? Because I can. (Actually I don't like how Josshii looks and they've also romaji'd Watta as Wattaa which is technically correct but nobody actually refers to him as that in English, so romaji is a personal choice, really).

(2) 冴えない means plain, ugly, boring, uninteresting, so there’s nothing about her that sets her apart from other girls. I translated it differently in these places because I thought it would fit better

(3) This was really hard to translate. 降臨 means ascent and ジャニーズ公認 literally means Johnny’s official recognition, but it doesn’t literally mean that she’s such a big fan that Johnny’s have officially recognised it or anything. Apparently this is something Johnny’s fans write on social media and I’m not 100% sure what it means but it’s a bit like saying you’re XX’s biggest fan and nobody else loves them more than  you do. So essentially she likes Tamachan and Johnny’s so much she’s ascended to the level where everyone recognises it. If someone else has a better way of translating or explaining this please explain it to me!!

(4) Literally means “it’s a serious illness” like, her love for Tamachan is a serious illness (I love how I’m referring to Jossie Matsumura as if she is a real person)